Spanking New Year to all!

As the door of 2009 closes, another year unfolds for a spanking new beginning on the road of life.  May this New Year bring more hope to everyone and have much courage to face all the odds in life.  And in this brand new day to commence for another chapter in our daily living, forget the bad and treasure the good.   Start your year right by being more optimistic and hopeful.  Blessed and Prosperous 2010 everyone!

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I Want to Disappear!

Yep, with just a snap I want to  escape and hide from the harsh reality of this world.  I want to disappear and vanish for crying out loud.  I’ve been feeling so down and helpless this very specific day.  Reality struck on me that life is indeed difficult.  I do not know if I’ve been hit by midlife crisis.  I just do not know what my ideals, goals and wants are.  All I know is I want to relax my brain from thinking what would be in store for me in the future.  How am I gonna survive from this shitty feeling that I am in.  *sobs

Geez, this f**k*n* BS life! Oppsss, sorry if I swear on that part.  I just can’t helped it! It is so difficult when more often than not you shoulder a big responsibility especially in the family’s role.   I do not want to complain and be selfish but life is so darn unfair on why it treated me this way.  Do I deserve all this shit? I’ve been a good sister, daughter and a friend and experiencing all this f**k tortures me big time! I totally and freakin’ hate it! Argh, my head hurts.

That is why I want to disappear right as this very moment as in NOW! I want to go where only beautiful scenery and tranquil atmosphere surround the place to give my tired soul and heart the solace to rest and a time to comfort myself from this cruel world.  I want to experience how it feels like to fly like a bird where all you think is being freewheeling, no problems to worry and no pain to feel.  I want to break free even just for a day.

I despise myself when I feel this way because I will feel so low, depress and frustrated.  Oh, Lord God help me! Enlighten my gloomy soul and mind to see the light on the road to the right pathway!

No water!OMG!

I just realized right at this very moment that we got no water to use for taking a bath or washing dishes until tomorrow because there is a damage with the water source we usually go for fetching.  Darn, my brain loads slowly nowadays.  I did not realized that  kind of thing after my sister told me that I got no water to use to take a bath for tomorrow! Geez, this is so disgusting! OMG, I cannot imagine myself going to the office without taking a bath. Gosh!

Could anyone send me barrels of water?LOL OMG! What to do now?!waaaa

He’s Just Not That Into You

I had just finished watching “He’s Just Not That Into You” flick and it made me realized that a girl should not read between the lines excessively about the guy that she likes because chances are you are either  receiving wrong signals or decoding the signs in a wrong way.  Stop wasting your time to guys who do not waste their time to you.  Do not be stuck in the state of waiting in vain or deciphering guy’s words & actions but in the end it will leave you wasted.  Here are some of the things to know if  He is just not that into you as quoted from the authors Greg Behrendth and Liz Tucillo:

  • If  he is not calling you (Men know how to phone call).  Yeah right,  stop hoping or worst expecting that maybe someday or maybe after few days this hot & cute guy will call you.  Stop that delusion because if  a guy is really interested with the girl after few minutes of dating he will definitely drop a message.
  • If he’s not asking you out (If he likes you, he will ask you out).  This is such an obvious sign that if a guy does not invite you for a coffee or date, then he is not that into you.  Do not give your guy an excuse that he might happen to be a very busy person  because that is not the way it is. A guy who is interested with a girl will find a way to ask her for a date.
  • If he’s not dating you (Hanging out isn’t dating). There’s a big difference between these two.  Dating refers to only the two of you going out for a dinner date or a night full of fun whilst hanging out is you are everywhere with whoever.  If he is not dating you it clearly signifies that he doesn’t want to spend his time with you.
  • If he’s not touching you (when men like you, they love to touch you always!).  Men specifically are touchy nature.  He won’t be shy to touch you  in any places not unless you are his other woman or he isn’t proud that you are together.
  • If he’s cheated on you (Read: There’s never been a good excuse for cheating). Just because there is someone who is prettier, sexier and good looking than you he has the reason to cheat.  Hell NO! When a guy is into a girl, he will not have the courage to cheat because he values the trust you give him and stay committed to the relationship.  If your guy cheated on you then he is not into you,  break away from this kind of guy because he is becoming unworthy of your time.
  • If he’s disappeared from you (Closure all by yourself). A red flag that any girl should not take this for granted.  This kind of attitude is so rude and frustrating because why can’t men say directly to a girl that they do not like her anymore? Why make the girl assume and think things that will make the torture of her heart more painful and prolonging?  Geez, men of this type are such a total jerk and stupid.

These are just some of the long lists that a man is not into a woman.  And the lesson I learned in this movie is that girls should never assume that when a guy does something good or gives a positive feedback after the date.  Because  it does  not necessarily mean  that he is into her.   A girl should know how to read signals and just reciprocate the feelings once the guy is overly persistent and consistent with his affection and actions to the girl he fancies.  It might be easy said to decipher a guy’s feelings than done but girls should keep in mind that not all good things he has shown are good, some of it are just superficial or testing if  his charisma works on you.  Do not be delusional and live in the world of fantasy  so that you won’t hurt yourself in the end.

*Excerpt  from the movie that I totally love

Gigi: Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, Every story we’re told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we’re so focused on finding our happy ending we don’t learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don’t, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn’t include a guy, maybe… it’s you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is… just… moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.

It was a Blast!

On this special season of love and joy, I had a wonderful and great Christmas experience.  I never thought that it will turn out this way since I did not anticipate that I will fully enjoy this Yuletide season.  I started the night by going to a mass with my brother and listen to the homily by one of the priests.  Though, I did not like how he delivered the sermon nevertheless I take my time to give all the thanks to our Lord Almighty for the graces and good health that He bestowed upon us.  This Christmas, it made me realized that no matter you have foods for Noche Buena or not what is important is that you are given another chance to celebrate the season with full of enthusiasm, positivity and thankfulness.  I can feel the overwhelming presence of the Lord Jesus Christ wrapping every nook of our soul, heart and house.  And with that I could not ask for more!

One more thing that added spice as I celebrated  Christmas, is that we chat for more than an hour with a friend of mine and Handsome Nurse! Yay,  for the whole conference I kept on laughing, grinning and felt tickle in my bones! LOL   Well, who on Earth would not be gay when your crush converse with you eh? Gosh, though I throw jokes, which some of it are half meant..LOL I never expected that there will be some revelations that made me see hope with my feelings [as what I perceived it though I might over thinking and reading the lines and might be wrong with it] to my Handsome Nurse.  hehehe As the chat conference ended, never expected that after that conversation we will engage in a private conversation.  There, he opened up a part of his life and wishing me that I should not sleep though it is 5:00 in the morning already for crying out loud! LOL On my part I do not want to sleep yet but gosh it is already morning and then I do not want him to think that I am really dead serious with him because he might take advantage or have his distant on me, which I do not want to happen.  I want us to remain as  friends even if he doesn’t like me or reciprocates my feelings.   It was so good as it lasted.  It was one of the best Christmas gifts ever though I want to kill this whatever feelings that I have for him.  Christmas was  full blown and fantastic BLAST! wohoo! hehehe

Anyway,  I am so thankful to Him that another joyous Christmas had passed for me and my family.  I thanked for all the good things and safety He showered upon us! And I still continue to hope, pray and wish that may He continues to bless all humankind with goodwill and lots of loving here on Earth! Moreover, may all people will remain hopeful and strong against all odds!